I am a list maker. We all like to be in control and as seniors it is normal to make sure that we don’t loose track of forget anything. At work my post-it collection reminds me of things I have to do and I love being able to throw them away as I complete my tasks, but at home it serves as a source of frustration because I over book (list) myself. Therein lies the controversy on whether list making is a good thing or not. According to Nancy Kalish (Prevention, July 2009) list making does your mind and body good because it provides motivation and gives you a sense of balance and accomplishment.
This all is a matter of opinion, I suppose, because becoming a slave to your lists can serve to stifle your sense of creativity. I tend to create daily lists but put so many items on them that I cannot possibly do it all. Instead of feeling accomplished by the end of the day I feel frustrated and I focus more on the things that I didn’t get done than on those that I completed successfully.
I read another article called “Just Say No,” by Lee Silber (Artist Sketchbook, April 20003), which gives a different perspective. Because we all tend to over book our time we need to set some priorities. The author suggests looking at that daily list and asking, “what can I drop today?” Eyeball each task and decide if it is really matters and if all of your tasks are interfering with what you really want to be doing. It’s okay to be a little selfish.
Well, we can’t all to that but how about creating a way to stress proof that list. Nancy Kalish suggests keeping two lists instead of one. Try separating your long-range tasks from immediate ones so that you don’t feel overwhelmed by the “leftovers” at the end of the day. Lists don’t have to be carved in stone or written in ink. You can update them daily or weekly.
Do not become a slave to your list (like that is going to happen). Just because you have put something on your personal list doesn’t mean that you can’t delegate some of those chores. The most important thing is to factor in some fun. Yes, playing tennis or going out for lunch is important too. At least once a week, or even once a day, include doing things that you want to do instead of things that you have to do.
Another suggestion that I particularly like is following the 90 day rule. This means that if you are putting the same task or keeping the same task on your list for 90 days, it is time to scrap it. Ask yourself if it is worth the guilt that you feel when you view it as a “leftover” at the end of each day. If it is not essential, delete it. If you still feel that it must be done, either do it or delegate it.
It is hard to shuck the habit of list making. Even as a senior our lives are filled with minutia and whether it is because we miss that sense of urgency that we had when working full time or whether we just need to feel that sense of accomplishment, we will probably never rid ourselves of that “must do” feeling. The idea is feel joy each and every day. As Mr. Silber says, know your priorities and build your time around them.
Comments