Smart Senior

Senior Living: Dust Bunnies and Single Living

Living on your own cuts down on the amount of housework you have to do, but you will still need to do some routine tasks to assure that order prevails and you have clean clothes to wear.  Hopefully you have established a routine over the years but if you haven’t, it isn’t too late to gain the upper hand.

Cleaning isn’t new.  By the time you were old enough to walk you were being harped at to clean your room.  Now you not only have to clean your room but the entire house, unless you can afford a cleaning service (wishful thinking).  It you have already downsized into a smaller house or an apartment it will be easier to manage.  The operational word is downsize, which means that you have gotten rid of all of your unnecessary baggage.   If you have opted to stay in your family home you will need to think of creative ways to consolidate housekeeping tasks.   It is nice that the house stays cleaner for longer periods of time, but dust bunnies will find you just the same.  

Efficient housekeepers do not strive for perfection, but instead look for ways to multi-task and cut corners.  Most of us are born slobs and should probably still be living in caves.  We remain ever hopeful that our self worth will not be measured by our housekeeping efforts.  Have you ever wondered whether the broken shards, unearthed by avid archeologists, were broken and swept under a mat long before time ceased to exist for our ancestors? 

There is still hope for you if you are a slob because you never really learned how to do housework.   Help is available as hundreds of books have been written on how to do housework, beat the clock, and still have a life.

If it’s Tuesday, it must be toilets.  How obsessive are you?  If you need help and support to conquer onerous housekeeping tasks, it is available.  Please visit the “Side-tracked Home Executives” at www.shesintouch.com or www.flylady.com for advice and discussion forums that can free you from the oppression of housework.  You can follow their suggestions or not, but at least you will know that you are not alone.    On the other hand if you really really hate housework, consider a cleaning service (some even have senior discounts).  It could be the beginning for a whole new you.   Peace of mind is paramount.  Never feel guilty.  Do housework in order to create a comfortable atmosphere for yourself; you are not doing it to impress your relatives or neighbors. 

If you are still considering a remodel or a move, be sure to pick the right place or the right service.  Tell your real estate agent what you want.  Some people don’t like too many stairs or ceramic countertops because they are too hard to clean.  Look for a place with molded shower stalls, kitchen cupboards that go all the way to the ceiling and knobs and brackets that are easy to wipe around.  At the very least, splurge on some good equipment.  I haven’t found them yet, but somewhere out there is a vacuum cleaner that actually sucks up everything and a mop that really absorbs.   I do not like to do housework and it is always on the very bottom of my list of things to do, but no matter how you look at it, we all want a certain amount of order in our lives.

 

 

Senior Living: Cooking for One

Cooking for one or two can be challenging.  If you have never been known for your culinary expertise it can be even more challenging. I don’t know about you, but I am tired of cooking.  I have even toyed with the idea of subscribing to one of those weight loss programs because they promise to have delicious low calorie foods delivered to the door.  That really seems like cheating though.

You have to eat though, and eating properly is just as important as exercising if a healthy lifestyle is important to you.  I keep meaning to buy some of the Cooking for One or Two cookbooks.  If I could find one recipe that I really liked I would hop on board.  It is much too easy to call for take out, buy already prepared entrées, or nuke a TV dinner.   Why bother with anything else?

It isn’t easy finding grocery items packaged for one or two.   Supermarkets encourage overspending and push ready made products instead.   Single portions cost two or three times more than family packages.  Nobody needs 10 chicken breasts unless they are cooking for a family of five, and unless you rent locker space your little freezer isn’t going to be big enough to hold multiple servings of anything.    

So, it is just you.  You are alone for dinner?  Judith Jones, author of “The Pleasures of Cooking for One,” knows how to make you feel guilty if you don’t cook.   She looks down her nose and asks if you are going to take the easy way out, or are you going to prepare yourself a delicious little meal, because “you are worth it.”?

Well okay, you say, but what do you do to get into a cooking mindset?  You may have to ease into it gradually.  Let’s think of some ways to make sure that you aren’t eating microwave noodles and television dinners every day of the week.  Personal preferences enter into the picture too.  Some people care more about food than others.  Personally, I could make a pan of tuna casserole and eat it every day for a week, but that is just me.  I still wouldn’t mind learning how to cook, especially now that dietary restrictions have entered the picture.

 Learn how to cook small.  Get rid of your kings sized pots and pans.  The rule of thumb when cooking for one is to use recipes that serve two.  If cooking for two, use recipes that serve four.   Purchase a lot of single-sized serving containers, label everything and store in the freezer or at least in plain sight in the refrigerator.  Buy individual casserole dishes and consider using a toaster oven.  The right tools can make things much less overwhelming.  

 Purchase single sized servings of food and consider splitting (put a sign up at the senior center) the cost of certain grocery items with someone else.  It would be nice to buy an egg or two or a half loaf of bread, but it isn’t going to happen.

A healthy meal plan is important and living alone is no reason to deny yourself the pleasure of a home cooked meal.   Buy the right books, splurge on the right tools and treat yourself to the nutritious and delicious meals that you deserve.   If you really are too busy or are preparing for a one man showing at an art gallery it is okay to eat out.  Take a few minutes to visit your local senior center and share good company and a healthy meal with your friends.  

 

 

 

 

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Senior Living: A Place To Live

The best way to get out of a rut is to get a place of your own.  Some people want to downsize into a smaller house or an apartment, while others prefer to stay in their family home.  Whatever your choice, now is the time to make your place your own.   Few of us have had the time, the money, or the energy to create the home of our dreams.  Life happened and it was hard enough just keeping the house reasonably clean and tidy.   The decorating schemes featured in glossy magazines and on movie sets were never going to happen anyway.  I can think of a hundred different things that I would do differently if I were starting over again, but do I have the courage to make it happen? 

Perhaps it doesn’t matter.  Some folks are “house proud” and want their homes to reflect something more than just being a place to sleep and eat.  The rest of us might be happy to just have a roof over our heads.   How about you?  Do you want a home that is a showplace or one that looks “lived in”?   You are on your own now and this may be your last chance.

 If you want your home to reflect who you are, now is the time.  Sharon B. Siepel (Essential Survival Guide to Living on Your Own) asks you to decide what is most important to you?   Think in terms of modern, old fashioned, accessible, clean, convenient, comfortable, practical, or light and airy.  Assess what you have and what you want to have, and go from there.

If you are retired you will be spending more time at home, which means it should be something that makes you happy.   If you have always wanted white cabinets, cheery yellow walls, more windows, or French doors that open to the patio, you should go for it.  Make your home just right for you.

Ideally your home should be a reflection of who you are and what you value.  Treat yourself well.  Your home should be your sanctuary.   I read somewhere about using your five senses (sight, hearing, touch, smell and taste) as your guideline.  Sounds rather peaceful and Zen doesn’t it?    A welcoming color, a decorative mat or flowering plants all say “welcome home” when you walk through the door.  Start with your foyer and move through your home.  It should be restful and inviting.  Favorite pieces or artwork, mirrors, comfortable furniture and a lot of light can make it that way for you.

The article went on to discuss how sound, smell, and tactile sensations can delight your senses.  There is no right or wrong.  Your home should be a place that pleases you, but you don’t want to be such a slave to fashion that you lose your sense of adventure.   Doesn’t the thought of birds at a feeder, comfortable furniture, flowers, soft carpets, and silky bed sheets tempt you just a little?  That isn’t to say that being surrounded by your own projects isn’t good too.  It is your place after all, go for it!

Senior Living: Retired and Living On Your Own

It’s time to get organized.  I thought that being retired would mean finally having the time and energy to get a handle on my life.   It doesn’t seem to be working that way.  So, after a year of frivolous busyness I am ready to pull things together and get on with the rest of my life.

Relocating, redecorating and remodeling were fun but how much time can you spend on that? What happens now?  There are dozens of self help books written about retirement.   Some tell you to forget about planning and enjoy the time off; others tell you to plunge right in and start making things happen.  The good news is that the choice is yours.  The bad news is that procrastination becomes a habit.  How do you plan on navigating the world as a single?

How many times have you heard retired people say that they are so busy that they don’t know how they ever had time to work?   There still aren’t enough hours in a day.  How can this be?  How can you manage all of the activities of daily living without making it seem like work?

Author Sharon B. Siepel (Essential Survival Guide to Living on Your Own) writes about everything you need to know to live as a single.  Her book is interesting and comprehensive enough to keep on your shelf as a reference book.  Her advice is timely and as pertinent to young people setting out on their own as it is to a senior starting over again.   She points out rather sagely that opportunities are not going to come your way unless you plan for them to happen. I think she is right.  There will always be things that you want to do, but they aren’t going to happen unless you get your act together.    Being organized is all about balancing your immediate needs (grocery shopping, cooking, trips to the library, taking a yoga class, learning how to do whatever you want to do, and so on and so forth) against long term goals (getting a GED, going back to college, learning how to draw, building houses for humanity or whatever your passion happens to be).

Productive people throughout the ages learned how to manage their time.  They learned how to manage time when they went to school, when they juggled career and home and when they multi-tasked at work.   What made you think it would be different now?   Efficiency experts will tell you to look at how you spend (waste) your time.  How much time do you spend preparing meals, eating, household chores, driving to and from the gym etc. visiting with friends, watching television, surfacing the internet and so on and so forth?  They will tell you to write down everything that you need to do and everything that you want to do.  They stress learning how to prioritize and then have the gumption to say “no” when you are pressured into deviating from your plan.   Just because you are a single doesn’t mean that you have to be at everyone else’s beck and call. 

So, what is your pleasure: sticky notes, a calendar with big white squares, an electronic organizer or a computer generated plan (my new phone even has an app for notes and reminders).  No excuse for not being able to write things down. Once you have chosen a method you can start recording all of your activities.  Remember to factor in those long term goals and think about how you are going to make them happen (take a class; join a group, volunteer, take a trip etc.).   Be reasonable.  You don’t want to overbook yourself, but you want to do enough that you feel a sense of pride and accomplishment. 

 

 

 

 

Swimming: The Perfect Exercise for Aging Bodies

You can learn how to swim.   I learned how to swim when I was a teenager, so I know what it is like to be bigger and older than anyone else in the class.  I was the only “big kid” in a class of 5 and 6 years old “puddlers”.  Fortunately, the instructor was very sweet and didn’t make me feel foolish, but I worked hard so that I could graduate and become a “minnow” and then later a “shark.”    I hope that you aren’t refusing to learn how to swim because you think you are too old or too timid.  The YMCA’s and Community centers have lessons for grown-ups now, so you will never be made to feel like you are the odd man out.  I can’t promise that you won’t be the oldest one in the class, but I won’t tell if you don’t.  

If you are looking for an enjoyable, healthy way to improve your fitness level, perhaps you should consider swimming.  Just because most people learn when they are children does not mean that you missed your chance.   Swimming and other aquatic exercises are the perfect fitness workouts for people who suffer from arthritis and other chronic pain conditions.   The Wall Street Journal featured an article by Jeremy Singer-Vine this morning (February 14, 2012) about swimming and good health.  Recent studies by the American Journal of Cardiology indicate that older, more sedentary adults can benefit from this form of exercise.  Swimming, it seems, can be instrumental in reducing blood pressure and improving artery health.

If you don’t know how to swim at all it will be more challenging than going for a walk, but when have you ever backed away from a challenge?  Swimming exercises most of the muscles in the body without the pounding on the knees and joints that can occur with walking, jogging or running, because the water supports your joints.  Swimming is a non weight-bearing sport.    For this reason, physicians often recommend swimming and water exercise for older adults, disabled people and for those recovering from broken bones and back injuries.

If you still can’t stand to get your face wet (come on, give it a try, you can learn how to swim even if it is just the dog paddle or side stroke), you will be pleased to learn that water exercises have been designed for non-swimmers as well.

Water exercises are fun and they are therapeutic.  Water exercises can help people regain fitness levels, mobility, strength, endurance, and flexibility to all body parts.  Aqua aerobics, aqua exercise, water walking and aquatic dance exercises are all fancy names used to entice you into the water. How can you resist?   Free from the effects of gravity, senior adults can move easily in the water.  This form of exercise meets the needs of persons of all ages and conditions.

 

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Senior Living: Living Alone and Loving It

  Living alone and liking it sounds easy enough, but society still seems to feel that you can’t be truly happy unless you are in a relationship.   Nevertheless, statistics tell us that “singles” make up a rapidly growing segment of the population.  Your reasons for embracing a single lifestyle will remain personal, but like it or not you will be faced with making decisions that were previously shared.  A new job, divorce, death of a spouse, empty nest, or not marrying by choice will have separated you from the herd, so to speak.  The first decision of course, will be to decide if you are going to withdraw into a shell or if you are going to embrace your new circumstances.

Getting your affairs in order and deciding if you are going to move, or reinvent your current living arrangements, will be high on your list.   Whether you downsize into an apartment, condominium or smaller house is up to you.  Some people thrive when surrounded by everything familiar and some do not.  Nearly everyone hates something about their current living situation. You may want more windows, a patio, big rooms instead of small, or you may want to paint everything a cheery yellow.  Be mindful of accessibility issues when you redo your home, but take some time to turn it into something you truly love.  .

So what comes next?  It may be time for list making and a great deal of reflection, but don’t take too long.  As you know, inertia sets in rather quickly and that can take the fun out of just about anything. Sooner or later you will have to get down to the “nitty gritty” of everyday living.  Living on your own is all about making decisions.  Big decisions reflect where and how you will live, but the smaller ones are important too.  By small we are talking about activities of daily living.  You know things like what to have for breakfast this morning or how to adjust to cooking for one.

Age doesn’t have anything to do with having dreams, goals, and plans.  On the inside you don’t feel any older than you did when you were 26, so stop acting like age matters so much.  Studies show that older adults are actually more engaged in everyday goal pursuits than younger adults.  You are not too old to start over.   Goals are dreams written on paper, so get your note pad right now.   I know you still have goals because I do.  Your first goal may be as basic as getting a physical exam.  Learn everything you can about aging and conditions that may be pertinent to your situation (that’s a nice way of saying deal with whatever might be wrong with you), and then formulate a wellness-fitness plan.   

After years of worrying about everyone else, it is time to put your own well-being first.  Once you know what you have to work with physically you can start thinking about the dreams and aspirations that have lurked in the back of your mind since childhood days.   Did you like to write stories or was art really fun when you took it in high school?   Did you want to hike the Appalachian Trail before you settled down, and then never did?   A lot of dreams get lost in the shuffle, but now is your time.   Oh I know!  I have trucked a set of classics from one side of the country to the other but have yet to read them.  Actually I started a few times but thought they were pretty boring.  Maybe the time just wasn’t right.  Perhaps a class on appreciating the classics might make a difference.   Once the list is made, you can think about what you need to do to make your dreams come true.   Start by visiting your local Community College or Senior Center.   Plan your new life as diligently as you did when you moved out of your comfort zone to go away to college the first time.  You are still the same person.  Find something interesting, exciting and purposeful to do, no matter what your age.

 Sharon B. Siepel, the author of “Survival Guide to Living on Your Own” put together a great reference book.  The author covers everything you need to know about living on your own without boring you to tears. She talks about everything from getting through the day to making a will.

 

Senior Living: Living On Your Own

Living on your own can be difficult at any age, but especially trying if you have spent a lifetime caring for and/or being cared for by others.   It doesn’t help that others assume that older people who live alone feel isolated and lonely.

It is possible for older people to live alone, and to do so successfully.  It is easier to accept if you can separate the idea that living alone and being lonely are different.  Some older people actually like living on their own.  Lorna Easterbrook, editor of WwoP (Working with older People) examines some of the assumptions made about older people living alone.  People who adjust well think of it as “living on my own” rather than as “living alone”. The focus is on “living” rather than on “alone”. There is a subtle difference if you can pick up on the nuances.

If you have been on the giving or receiving end of a care-giving relationship it will undoubtedly take longer to adjust.  You may not realize it, but somewhere along the line you have forgotten how to enjoy your own company. Once you get over the idea that every moment needs to be filled with busyness, it will be easier to figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life.  After all, you never stop being a work in process.  If you already enjoy your own company it will be easier.  It should feel good to be in control and to do things that you want to do for a change.  If you have denied yourself the simple pleasures of a nap or a bubble bath in the middle of the day, you will know what I am talking about.  Do you feel guilty if you watch a daytime soap, play tennis in the evening, order a pizza for dinner or fall asleep with the television on?  Will the world end tomorrow if you have leftovers for breakfast instead of bacon and eggs?  Do what you want to do.  

 It is good to form connections with others, young and old, that have nothing to do with business luncheons or fund raisers.  Be open to accepting all kinds of invitations that will get you out of the house.  You may meet some very interesting people.  Living alone means that there is only one of you, so all chores associated with independent living will have to be done by you.  Cooking, housework, yard work and home maintenance will all fall on your shoulders.  This may cut seriously into your periods of self fulfillment and may make you reconsider where you want to live.  . 

Rediscovering who you are could be the adventure of a lifetime. Give yourself a chance before jumping into another relationship just because you are alone.   So, what do you want to be when you grow up?  What were you doing before your plans were derailed by school, job, marriage and children?   No ideas?  Now is the time to explore your options, and gain new experiences. Over the next few days I would like to examine some of the issues that occur when you find yourself living on your own.  Please ask questions and share experiences.

 

Senior Health and Fitness: A Sedentary Life Style Is A Poor Choice

People tend to be less active as they get older, but the need for physical activity never changes.  A supplement in the last AARP bulletin (January/February 2012), featured an article by Elizabeth Pope that discussed why sitting is hazardous to your health.

Everyone knows that exercise is good for them, but most don’t understand that it may be a life or death situation.  That makes it sound a little more serious doesn’t it?  Everyone is familiar with the term SIDS, but have you ever wondered why there wasn’t a term for premature death in other age groups?  Well, there is.  Dr. Frank Booth, PhD. coined the term SeDS), which you can probably figure out means Sedentary Death Syndrome.  What do you think of that?  Dr. Booth started an organization called Researchers against Inactivity-Related Disorders (www.prevention.com/links), which draws attention to something that should mean a lot to us.   I hope you will take his work to heart and start thinking about SeDS as it might apply to you.

You wouldn’t think that we would need to take a break from sitting, but it seems that older people are some of the worst offenders.  You see older folks sitting everywhere, and at some point you start to accept sitting as a normal part of aging.   Technology has literally engineered physical activity out of our daily lives, and we are all suffering the consequences. Today the focus is changing, and a rocking chair on the verandah is no longer an acceptable goal.     Ms. Pope mentioned that prolonged sitting actually disrupts the processes that break down fats and sugars in the blood.  I didn’t know that.  It is lucky for us that there is a cure for this syndrome because lack of exercise is associated with all sorts of debilitating ailments.

 The answer, as you already know, is to get moving.   Being sedentary may be more hazardous than other well known risk factors, such as smoking, hypertension and heart disease.   Even people who are genetically predisposed to certain illnesses can cut the risk of premature death by simply adding exercise to their daily activities.   Don’t use the world exercise if it turns you off.   Just think in terms of adding movement to your life.  Think of movement as exercise. Did you know that shopping can be an aerobic exercise, especially if you stop using escalators and elevators?  Find some form of physical activity that you like and are able to do, and make it a part of your routine.   Think of ways to keep moving and before you know it, it will be a part of who you are.

Aging-In-Place: At Home With Help

The term aging-in-place is confusing despite having been around since the beginning of time.  The concept is pretty basic but people struggle to understand what it means or whether it is indeed possible for them.  We lost our focus when it became the norm for older people to move into retirement homes and just fade away.  Well, we aren’t into fading away anymore and we are more into wanting to do thing our way.  Today, our way means we want to stay in our own homes, but we still haven’t figured out how to make this happen if we start slipping a little.

Ultimately your health is going to be the determining factor, but if you could receive care in your own home wouldn’t you want to stay there? The trouble is money.  People who don’t think twice about selling their house and moving into a care facility will balk at the idea of spending a few bucks for home care.  Think it through.  New studies show that home care is less expensive in the long run.  

We all want to be healthy and independent during our senior years.  John Schieszer writing about how aging in place may be optimal (Northwest Prime Time: February/March 2012) examined the differences between the traditional model of care and the aging-in place-model.   I liked what he had to say and his material was backed up by a similar article found in the Targeted News Service: Washington, D.C. (March 1, 2011).  Articles written for senior publications always make a lot of sense to me and I never fail to pick up a copy.  The conventional model forces older adults to leave their homes to move into senior housing, into assisted care facilities and eventually into nursing homes as their health and function decline.  The Aging-in-place model provides services and care to meet increasing needs in the home. The key here is that aging-in-place does not mean that you have to go it alone.

The goal, of course, of both models is to restore and maintain people at the highest level possible.  Yes, there are actually people trained to coordinate home care.  There are care managers, personal health care managers and nursing care coordinators trained to keep you right where you are as long as possible.  People do better at home.  It is as simple as that.   Services are added or subtracted as your current level of care changes.   The idea is to monitor for changes, provide prompt intervention and return you to your previous level of health.  Deciding to stay in your own home does not mean that you are expected to manage everything on your own. 

 

Independent Living and Home Safety: Furniture Tip-over Injuries

The Herald featured an article on January 31, 2012 about preventing tip-over injuries in the home. The author, Mary Beth Breckenridge, focused on how to child proof a home, but I would like to take this a bit further.  Older people are vulnerable too.  I can’t begin to tell you how many seniors have fallen victim to similar incidents.

We all know that tripping over electrical cords or throw rugs are accidents waiting to happen but there are other culprits.  Have you ever watched an older relative or friend hold onto a flimsy end table, a chest of drawer or a  television tray table when getting out of a chair or moving around a room?   Falls and other injuries due to furniture tip-over’s can happen at any age and can result in head injuries and broken bones.    Most falls occur when adults or children fall against or steady themselves against unstable television stands, shelves, bookcases, dressers, desks, chests, and appliances.

Even a large item like a television can easily be overturned.  Did you know that you can buy straps to anchor a television or other large furniture items?   Children can easily pull heavy items over on top of them, but don’t forget that an adult struggling to maintain balance will grab onto to anything to protect themselves.  

Large televisions’ and unstable pieces of furniture are hazards, especially when paired together.  Look around your home for hidden dangers and address them promptly.  It only takes a few minutes to check that all items are firmly secured, stable and not prone to tipping or falling over.  Recommendations often include using safety straps or L-brackets, purchasing furniture with wide legs or a with a solid base, installing drawer stops on chest of drawers, and placing heavy items close to the floor.   It never hurts to anchor chests, dressers, television stands, bookcases and entertainment units to the floor or attach them to the wall.  Statistics show that one-half to two-thirds of adult falls occur in and around the home.  I had always assumed that most at home falls were caused when navigating stairs or using a ladder, but it seems that “same level living areas” are even more common.    Find these hidden dangers in your home and take action now.