Still, after working with
seniors for many years I am under the impression that negativity is alive and well.
My father-in-law didn’t like anything, my mother-in-law started talking
about dying when she was 65 and my parents just gave up. I wasn’t surrounded by positive attitudes. I learned early on in my career not to ask a
senior how they were or how they were feeling unless I really wanted to
know. They never felt good and just
asking the question provided the opportunity for them to focus on negative
happenings. The odds of having someone
say they felt fine, or good, or excited to face the day, were next to
none. I did find that telling them how
good they looked took them off guard and changed the focus a bit. You don’t have to be old to be negative. We are surrounded by negativity at every
turn.
How do you meet the
challenges of aging without falling into a pattern of negativity? Dr. Agin suggests that being aware of your
negativity is half the battle, and figuring out how to turn it around is the
other half.
- Stop worrying about what other people think
about you (the chances are pretty good that other people are not thinking
about you at all).
- Stop brooding or obsessing about your problems.
- Stop dwelling on the past and worrying on things
that you can’t change.
- Stop putting yourself down. You should be your own best friend.
- Put negative thoughts into perspective.
Unless you are talking to your health care
professional, try to refrain from launching into a litany of negatives. If
someone asks how you are or how you are feeling, a simple “good” or “fine” is
sufficient. Talk about positive things like what you learned
when you read the paper, or how much you are looking forward to a cooking class
or a Spanish lesson and what your plans are for the future.
Focus
on staying active and in touch with the world:
·
Know what is
going on in the world
·
Get a job
·
Help others out
·
Get out and
travel
·
Embrace a hobby
·
Be civic minded
·
Use your
computer
·
Exercise
A
little negativity is normal but constant negativity can make you feel stressed,
anxious, depressed or bitter. Is this
the way you want the rest of your life to be?
Being connected to the world is good for your physical and mental health,
and being optimistic can help you live longer. It might take some work on your
part, but it is possible to cultivate a positive
outlook overall. Life is good.
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