Seniors: Throw Away People?

 

A letter to advice columnist (Ask Amy) in the Seattle Times on Sunday 2010 brought to mind thoughts about how we often treat our elderly like “throw a ways.”  The question asked was about what to do with “mom” now that she had out lived her “usefulness”.  The writer had invited her mother-in-law into her home 13 years ago and admits that the arrangements re: babysitting etc. had many benefits for all.  However, now that mom was 89 and was no longer useful, the family felt that she impinged on their privacy and they were tired of the present arrangement.

 

What could be sadder than picking up on the sense that you are no longer wanted?   Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and grief are no strangers to older people and are almost too much to bear.  Do you think that they don’t notice?

 

 Caring for older parents should be considered a blessing, a repayment for their sacrifices, and an opportunity to express feelings of thanks for all that they did for your family.  This isn’t always easy because people can be difficult and relationships can be strained, but think about how your will want to be treated when it is your turn to be dependent on someone else.

 

The solutions offered were finding mom an assisted living facility or figure out some way to configure the house so that everyone could get some privacy.  Both of those suggestions sounded good but they were just the tip of the iceberg, don’t you think?

 

 Hopefully decisions about care and living arrangements can be resolved at an early stage.  What are your thoughts on the situation?